If only work was this exciting!

Green goo dripped gloppily onto my desk, onto my hands, onto my forehead. I wiped my forehead with the back of my hand accidentally tasting the slime. It was salty and bitter with the slight odour of cheese. The texture was worse. It was like eating partially coagulated blood, or the chunks in the bottom of a past due milk carton. My throat heaved. Instinctively I spat the goo onto the office carpet. Ugh. A shiver ran up my back raising the dark hairs that speckle my arms. What the fuck was that? I looked up and saw the mass cling precariously to the ceiling. Another drip was forming. Realising that my mouth was hanging open I shut it with a clack that hurt my jaw just in time to avoid another mouthful.
Searching randomly through websites I found a page that asked: "What do you want to do with your life?" Without thinking I wrote: "Write incessently and have a lot of sex."

Sounds fun, eh?